There is a good reason why you may have been feeling indecisive, scattered, or lost–even before the pandemic.
You’re unconventional.
Every society has its conventions. When you’re someone who does not fit neatly into such norms, your path is rougher…and less clear.
For example, if you want to become a doctor, or a financial advisor, there is a clear roadmap to follow. There are required exams and courses to take and licenses to obtain. Moreover, to attain these, there are support systems created around those career paths.
Many of my clients, however, have creative talents where neither the road nor the reward systems are clear.
Many were also willing to step off of a conventional path in order to raise their children, allow their spouse to take a dream job, or take care of an elderly relative.
Society sees these women as unconventional. They are also, in my view, extraordinary.
But, there is no clear map and few support systems for such women.
I was very fortunate that when I was struggling to finish my dissertation, I found a Women’s Dissertation Support Group. As I got to learn about my fellow students’ projects, it was easy why we were all seeking support. Each project was groundbreaking or unusual and atypical within its field. Many were interdisciplinary. All were tackling important questions. Our advisors did not always know what to do with us, or they didn’t have a lot of power within our departments.
So many smart and caring women have internalized this lack of convention as something wrong with themselves. They quietly suffer wondering what is wrong with them. They feel like failures because they can’t figure out what they should be doing with their lives. Some avoid tackling these questions. Some set aside their dreams to focus on the success of their spouses or children or employers. And, while being the backbones of their families or their workplaces is important, without something of their own, they can’t help but feel some disappointment or dissatisfaction.
If you’re feeling indecisive, scattered or lost, there may be a good reason for those feelings. Please don’t delay. Don’t withhold your gifts from the world. We need you.
To cope with those feelings, start with these two steps:
First, change your mindset. Start thinking of yourself as unconventional–better yet, as extraordinary. If you catch yourself labeling your behavior as “lazy,” “indecisive,” “procrastinating,” “lost,” “failing,” substitute those words with “UNCONVENTIONAL” “EXTRAORDINARY.” “UNIQUE,” “FASCINATING,” or “CREATIVE.”
Then, check out some of the resources I have written just for you:
- To help you find your way: The Lighthouse Method
- To reclaim your time so you can begin your next chapter: Easy Time Management Tweaks for Smart and Caring Women
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Try one of my five best Easy Time Management Tweaks for Smart and Caring Women. And, if you’re not already receiving my newsletter, you’ll have the option to become a subscriber.